If you want to study yourself -- look into the hearts of other people. If you want to study other people -- look into your own heart

LETTIN GO
How does one let go? How do you say to the one you love.. “I will give way. Im bowing out.” When the mere thought conjures a fear so overwhelming that it takes away all that gives meaning to life. How do you let go of a feeling that celebrates a life shared together?
And so I wept. Every tear that I shed was ...an act of my ultimate sacrifice, the final act of love. Every waking day is a never ending cycle of anguish and resignation. When even in the silence of the night, I am haunted with images of what was and what could have been. How do you release my battered soul from the upheaveals of anger and love. I felt every thud and bang that I was made to suffer. But all these I go through, if only to prove a point. That I will not turn our short lived affair to anything less than noble, pure and life giving. Despite the incredulities, despite the flaws and against the tide of prudence, I wagered my life when I said yes to you.
Then suddenly, I am alone once more. Pain has given way to despair, loneliness to desolation. And in the struggle between my heart and my wit, I began to ask questions. Why me when my only mistake was to fall for you. Did you really love me? Who was I to you? You may have answers but I doubt if these can put my heart at peace. To provide a closure that will bring relief to all these pain. Restore back my ability to love. Move on with life.
So once again, I’m one solitary figure on a lonely road. I will travel alone.. once more… all over again. And as I take the first steps, I will take stock of my memories. Carefully sifting through the trials and tribulations of life. Weeping as I revisit the most painful episodes, taking refuge in sweet memories. But in all these, you will always linger on. There will be new faces, new chapters. But you will always abide in me. I too have decided never to forget. I will love you from afar for indeed, I was never meant to be a part of you.